How do you know?

How do you know if your happy with him? How do you know if he is the right one for you??
As i lay next to this beautiful man, i ponder many things..
i acknowledge my likes and dislikes of him, the good times, and the bad...but how do you know if all that good outweighs the bad???
As i lay next to this beautiful man, not only am i pondering, but i am also noticing what i havnt acknowledged before...
Why is it that although i am cuddled up ever so close to him, that i feel as if we are a thousand miles apart??....How did we end up this way???...
When you start a relationship, it all seems soo movie-like and perfect...but why? Why is it that it all starts this way and as it progresses it diminishes....almost as if none of it existed.
Now instead of working and trying so hard to say all of the right things, and doing your absolute best to make them feel special.....that effort all of a sudden disappears and you're left with an effortless love full of fights and hurtful words....and ultimately a broken heart.  
Why does the effort have to disappear?? 
If it is indeed true love, then shouldnt we therefore treasure and make the most of eachother? 
If it is indeed true love, shouldnt the fighting cease, the hurtful words diminish from our thoughts, and our love and care for another be the same as it was from the beginning?
As i lay next to this beautiful man i am thankful for him, through the good...the bad... and the seemingly impossible.
I love him and all that comes with him...

Although it feels  as though we are a thousand miles apart.....I also acknowledge that our hearts are the same<3